Ten things not to say on your Anniversary

1. I stopped caring about anniversaries when you stopped caring about cooking.
2. Today is our what?
3. Okay, let’s celebrate, but do we have to celebrate together?
4. I thought we only celebrated important events?
5. You can celebrate anniversaries with your next husband.
6. You don’t like what I pick out, so I thought why bother.
7. I got you a present worth a dollar for every time you were nice to me this year. Here’s a $5 gift certificate for McDonald’s.
8. If you want me to pretend like I care about our anniversary, I will.
9. You want to go out to dinner? Okay, okay, I’ll take you to Pizza Hut if it’ll shut ya up.
10. I thought you only had to celebrate anniversaries while you were still in love.