A little girl goes to see the doctor. She's got a pea in one nostril, a grape in the other, and a string bean stuck in her ear.
She says to the doctor, "I don't feel good."
The doctor replies, "The problem is clear to me. You're not eating right!"
What is Santa's favorite candy?
Jolly Ranchers!
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he had no body to go with.
What did the big telephone say to the small telephone?
"You're too small to be engaged!"
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