The grenadier!

Three men are in a car which is about to crash. They all decided to throw out one valuable item.

The first person throws out a rock. The second throws out a pen. The third throws out a grenade.

Their car crashes and they survive the crash. Then, they all start walking back to get their valuable items.

The first man sees a little girl crying and asks her, "Little girl, why are you crying?" The little girl replies, "Someone threw a rock at me!"

The second guy sees a little boy crying and asks him, "Little boy, why are you crying?" The little boy replies, "Someone threw a pen at me and poked me in the eye!"

The third guy sees a fat kid laughing really hard and so he asks him, "Hey kid, why are you laughing so hard?" The fat kid replies, "I farted and my house blew up."