"Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the divorce Court Judge said," And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week."
"That's very fair, your honor," the husband said. "And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."
A little boy went up to his father and asked: "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?"
The father replied. "Well son, you must have got it from your mother, cause I still have mine"
Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and values.
Stu said, "I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, Did you?"
Leroy replied, "I'm not sure, What was her maiden name?"
Frank Caliendo impersonates every character from Seinfeld in this video.
A broke blonde decides to ask God for help. “Dear Lord,” she prays, “if I don’t get some cash, I’m gonna lose everything. Please let me win the lottery.”
Lottery night comes, but the blonde doesn’t win. She prays even harder, saying, “God, why have you forsaken me? My children are starving. Please just let me win this once.”
Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light, and the blonde hears God speak.
“Sweetheart, work with me on this,” he says. “Buy a ticket.”
A young and foolish pilot wanted to sound cool on the aviation frequencies.
This was his first time approaching a field during the nighttime, and instead of making any official requests to the tower, he said, "Guess who?"
The controller switched the field lights off and replied, "Guess where!"
A Russian and an American were fishing on opposite sites of a river that divided East Germany and West Germany.
The American was very successful but the Russian caught nothing.
Finally he shouted to the American, “How do you manage to catch so many fish?”
“On this side of the river,” shouted the American, “the fish aren’t afraid to open their mouths.”
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